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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29008425">Would She?</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/onlyhereforellick/pseuds/onlyhereforellick'>onlyhereforellick</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>NCIS</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, F/M, alt ep 18x06, mini scene essentially</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 12:15:10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,401</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29008425</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/onlyhereforellick/pseuds/onlyhereforellick</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
      <p>Mini scene for 18x06! I love angst so read wisely 😉</p>
    </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ellie Bishop/Nick Torres</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>57</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Would She?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Mini scene for 18x06! I love angst so read wisely 😉</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The door slammed shut and Ellie felt the inner panic bubble and swell, fast.</p>
<p>She couldn’t be trapped again. She couldn’t.</p>
<p>Her pulse raced and her head throbbed. Hands started vibrating as a sweat broke out across her upper lip.</p>
<p>She wasn’t trapped again. She wasn’t.</p>
<p>Her feet paced in tight circles and her ears rang, drowning out any noise from the cell beside her.</p>
<p>This wasn’t happening, this wasn’t happening, <em>this wasn’t happening</em>.</p>
<p>A voice muffled, almost underwater to her foggy head amidst her intensifying panic attack, until it finally broke free.</p>
<p>She didn’t miss the undertone of panic reflected back though, “Ellie. Ellie, <em>Ellie</em>!” His voice cracking just barely at the final attempt to break her reverie.</p>
<p>Her feet froze, facing the bars dead center in her cell, ears trained on Nick’s voice.</p>
<p>She heard his hands grip the bars of his cell as he continued, the ache palpable, “Ellie. They’re gone, Ellie they’re gone.”</p>
<p>She could hear the desperation and panic and anger all mixed into his voice. Her mind swirling to make sense of each emotion, though.</p>
<p>Taking a shaky step forward until Nick’s voice sounded again, well it was more of a growling shout as he shook the bars. That stopped Ellie her tracks. Panic attack still brewing, but paused for the moment as she focused on his grunts and her breathing.</p>
<p>
  <em>In.</em>
</p>
<p><em>Out</em>.</p>
<p>Ellie felt her head clear slightly and tuned out Nick’s incoherent grumbling as he angrily shuffled around the cell. Her head turned to more clearly take in her surroundings and glinting, oddly placed blocks caught her eye.</p>
<p>
  <em>Was that...?</em>
</p>
<p>She didn’t even try to hide the panic rising yet again in her voice as she hurried to the edge of her cell closest to his, “Nick?” Not even waiting for a reply she continued, “These cells are rigged to blow.”</p>
<p>And her world came crashing down once again.</p>
<p>
  <em>In.</em>
</p>
<p><em>Out</em>.</p>
<p>Palms sweating as they gripped the bars. Heart pounding a mile a minute.</p>
<p>The water threatened to sweep her under at the thought of narrowly escaping death only a week ago to stare it in the teeth once again.</p>
<p>
  <em>In.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Out.</em>
</p>
<p>She thought she’d made it out. Made it out to see Nick again. Made it out to have that chance again.</p>
<p>
  <em>In.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Out.</em>
</p>
<p>Oh the irony in how cruel life was.</p>
<p>Nick’s hand gripping his own jail cell was visible in her periphery. She took in his white knuckling grip and nervously swallowed. If he was rattled, she was royally fucked.</p>
<p>He swore to hisself he’d be her stronghold and keep her safe. Swore the second her body was securely in his arms on that airstrip he’d never let go again. Never let her go through that again.</p>
<p>And here he was, trapped in a godforsaken ancient jail cell rigged with a bomb, helpless.</p>
<p>He wanted to scream, wanted to punch the cell door, wanted to shoot the wall.</p>
<p>He released the bars aggressively as he began to pace, and think. Nick knew he needed should calm Ellie, she had to be panicking right now. Even if she lied to the team about it, he could see. Her regular meetings with Jack weren’t a secret but he knew the middle of the night screaming sessions were.</p>
<p>His mind flew through possibilities as his voice shook trying to calm her, “We’ll get out of here Ellie.”</p>
<p>Her strained, “How?!” was another blow to his gut. He put her in this situation. He let them get here- driving them into the damn ditch in a failed car chase.</p>
<p>Lying through his teeth, Nick pushed on, “We’ll get out of here in no time. I’ve got a plan.”</p>
<p>Ellie was unnervingly quiet. And as he stepped towards the back edge of his cell Nick’s previous thoughts ran resurfaced- <em>shoot the wall...</em></p>
<p>He looked across the cell and saw the switch. Whether it had a dead man’s switch or not, he wasn’t sure. He skipped that part of FLETC, damn it.</p>
<p>Ellie still hadn’t spoken up but Nick’s growing determination to do <em>something</em> forced him into speaking, “Y-yeah, a plan. I’m going to shoot the switch.”</p>
<p>Raising his gun to take aim, ears buzzing with adrenaline, Nick hesitated as he heard Ellie’s own shrill tone.</p>
<p>“N-no, stop! Hello? Ricochet?” Even if Nick couldn’t see her, he knew she was hanging out her cell, voice anxious. “If you shoot the wall- the bullet will just bounce right back at you!”</p>
<p>He knew he couldn’t deny the worry in her tone, but Nick refused to think too deeply on that one. His mind was already set, he was getting her out of here.</p>
<p>In an attempt to sound assured, he replied, “I’ll duck,” involuntarily demonstrating the moment even if Ellie couldn’t well see him.</p>
<p>It didn’t take long for her voice to raise and cut him off. The pure fear in her tone finally giving him pause, “No- stop, <em>stop</em>! Just...” He thought she might trail off, “D-do you wanna know what I was going to tell Sloane during my appointment today?”</p>
<p>Consider his curiosity peaked. He officially halted all plans to shoot the switch. A feeling all too similar to hope began to bubble deep within. He didn’t respond, knowing she didn’t need prodding if she wanted to have this conversation.</p>
<p>And he was right. “I- when they were trying to get me on that plane, I knew there was a bomb, and I knew if they got me on that plane that I’d never get off. So I...”</p>
<p>Nick’s heart dropped to his feet at the grim reminder of all she’d been through at none other than his fault. He was torn—he wasn’t sure his heart could take this trip down memory lane but he needed to finally hear from her. They’d yet to truly talk about what happened that day.</p>
<p>“I fought.” Those two words confirmed everything he suspected but didn’t want to address. It just dug that knife in a little deeper. The situation <em>he</em> put her in. A situation she never deserved to be in. “I wasn’t just fighting for me, I was fighting—“</p>
<p>Ellie stopped. Almost unable to go on. And Nick felt his entire being hinge on her next words. He hadn’t realized through all of the guilt and self-loathing how much he needed to hear her say these next words. It wouldn’t take away the ripping guilt, but it may ease the pain.</p>
<p>When she still hadn’t gone on, Nick wished he could see her face. Leaning up from his slumped spot on the wall his ear ached to hear her voice again.</p>
<p>Would she say it? Would she say what he’d hoped to hear for months, years even?</p>
<p>He knew he would fight to the ends of the earth for Ellie. He’d risk his life in a heartbeat. He’d do anything in his power to see her again. There would be not a second’s hesitation.</p>
<p>
  <em>But would she? Would she fight...for him?</em>
</p>
<p>He swore she wasn’t going to speak again, the nerves pulling her under. Until she did.</p>
<p>Repeating herself, Ellie continued, “I- I was fighting for you. To see you...” His heart swelled like the grinch on Christmas, “to see Gibbs, to see McGee,” only to instantly shatter like glass.</p>
<p>His jaw clenched as tears threatened. Nick swore, <em>swore</em> it was going to happen then. She knew it, she <em>felt</em> it.</p>
<p><em>Bullshit</em>.</p>
<p>Nick said nothing. Didn’t trust his voice to speak.</p>
<p>Hers came out softly, “Nick?”</p>
<p>A gruff, “What?” was his only retort.</p>
<p>“Are you still going to shoot the switch?”</p>
<p>He scoffed aloud, and murmured under his breath, “Are you still going to lie to yourself?”</p>
<p>Until her breath hitched he was positive he’d been quiet enough.</p>
<p>But before he got the chance to backpedal, clanging sounded upstairs. Doors kicked in and shouts of federal agents echoed down. The calvary had arrived.</p>
<p>Gibbs and Jack flew down the stairs in a blur, cell doors whirred open and Jack had Ellie whisked away before Nick even got a glimpse of her face.</p>
<p>A strong hand on his back from Gibbs and Nick barely spared the father figure a glance, eyes staring at Ellie’s retreating back as he heard murmuring from Jack about a mandated week off starting immediately.</p>
<p>
  <em>Well, fuck.</em>
</p>
<p>That self-loathing returned in full hurricane force and threatened to take him down with it.</p>
  </div></div>
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